"Sugar And Spice And Everything Nice" "Linda! Linda, are you here? Linda, it's me!" Jeff Metcalf thought he heard something, but he wasn't quite sure. Another hint of a wail came from outside the house, and he ran into his parents' bedroom to get a peek outside the window. And then he rolled his eyes. It was Ginger, his sister's best friend, still dressed in her school uniform of a starched white blouse and plaid wool skirt, and her eyes were fixed towards Linda's bedroom window, waiting for some sort of response, but Jeff knew none would come--Linda was out with their mom, getting groceries. "Linda..." Jeff almost stuck his head out even further and shouted back at her in annoyance, but something stopped him. The desperation in her big blue eyes was all too evident, and to his surprise, he actually felt sorry for her. Something had upset her, all right. Well she's not going away on her own, he finally concluded. With a sigh, and barreled down the stairs to open the front door. "Geez, I don't think the folks over on the next block can hear you, Ginger," he said, stepping out into the porch. "Would you keep it down? What's the big emergency, anyway?" Her hands flew to her hips and she glared back at him. "I am not in the mood right now, buster. Where is she? I need to talk to her!" "She's not home yet. I can't believe you didn't know that--I thought you two were joined at the hip." Tears spilled down her eyes and he saw her bottom lip begin to tremble. "She's not?" she whimpered. "Well... when will she be home? "How should I know?" he shrugged, and he instantly regretted the flippant tone, as he watched her let out a quivering breath then turn on her heel to start to walk away. "Wait," he called out. "Are you... going to be okay?" She nodded without turning around. "Just tell her I'll be by later..." He sighed and ran down the steps after her. "Ginger," he said. "What?" "Do you wanna wait for her inside?" A smile began to form on her lips, and she started to walk back towards him. "Thanks," she said, tipping his cap down playfully as she made her way up the steps and walked into the house. Jeff rolled his eyes again. His sister sure had a weird friend. He came in cautiously, wondering where she'd be, and saw her sitting at the foot of the staircase, her elbows digging into her thighs, and her forlorn face resting in her hands. She looked up at him with a lost puppy look as he came in, and suddenly, he felt mighty uncomfortable. "What?" he said, feeling his cheeks get hot as she stared at him. She looked as if she were waiting for him to ask what was wrong. Jeff thought for a moment of just ignoring her by walking straight into the kitchen, but finally he sighed and pulled up a chair at the dining table. "So... what'd you come here for?" He knew instinctively he had phrased the question wrong, but he didn't know how else to say it. Girls just seemed so hard to talk to--it was like they were from a different planet altogether. He saw a hint of a smile and she seemed to be getting ready to say something, but then stopped herself. "Never mind," she said softly. "You wouldn't understand." Now he was offended. What was that supposed to mean? He was just as knowledgeable as any ten year old he knew! So what if she were two years older? What problem could she possibly have that he couldn't help her with? "Try me!" She gave him an incredulous look, then let out a giggle. "Well, I-" "Ginny!" "Linda!!!" Ginger leapt off the bottom step and into Linda's arms. "Oh Linda, I'm so glad you're home, I've been dying here!" Linda looked towards the dining table, and, seeing Jeff, laughed. "I hope my baby brother didn't annoy you too much," she said. "Shut up!" "Jeff... Don't talk to your sister that way." "But she-" "Jeff!" His mother's firm tone stopped him in his tracks, even though he was sorely tempted to react to Linda sticking her tongue out at him. It figured that he would be the one getting yelled at since his mother could only hear what they were doing. "I was being nice to her," he said to a disbelieving Linda. "Ask her!" Ginger raised her head from Linda's shoulder and nodded vigorously. "He was, Linda. He was... a true gentleman." She turned to him and gave him a grateful smile, and he felt the blood come to his cheeks. "Quit the mushy stuff," he said, and ran upstairs to the safety of his room. A few minutes later, he heard the stomping of feet on the stairs, and the tell-tale slam of his sister's door. Great, he said to himself. Now they'll be yapping right next door... Sure enough, he heard Ginger let out a dramatic sigh and though her voice was slightly muffled through the walls, he could still make out her words. "I'm going to die, Linda! I will not live to graduate junior high, because I'm going to die right here on the spot!" He could hear Linda's laugh and could just about picture the look of annoyance on Ginger's face. "Oh good," Ginger said. "I'm sitting here having a crisis and my best friend finds it hilarious! I'm so glad I can be a source of amusement for you, Linda." "Ginny, would you stop being so serious? What is this all about?" "Charlie Hailey, that's what!" A pause, and then Linda spoke again. "What did Charlie do now?" "He only ruined my life, Linda, that's all!" "What?" "I promised Mrs. Mahoney I'd stay after and help her with the book drive. I was taking the books to the library, when... I saw him." "Him?" "Charlie! Would you please pay attention?" "Sorry..." "Only he wasn't alone, Linda. He was with that slimey limey, Mary Elizabeth!" "Mary Elizabeth? But she just told everyone the other day that she thought he was a big jerk and she'd never give him the time of day!" Ginger snorted. "Well not only was she giving him the time of day, but she was giving him a lot more than that. She was kissing him!" Jeff heard Linda gasp. "You're lying..." "Would I make this up? That witch stole my man!! Oh Linda, how is he ever going to notice me now? She's snagged him for sure..." "Ginny, you don't know that! You can't be jumping to conclusions-" "Linda, you are so naive! She was kissing him! What else can that mean?" "Well... did he look like he was enjoying himself?" "Did you think I was going to stand around and enjoy the show?? How should I know if he enjoyed himself! I left before I got sick right then and there!" She sighed again, and Jeff heard the squeak of bedsprings as she jumped off the bed and began to pace. "What am I going to do, Linda? The only way I'll ever get Charlie now is if I let him kiss me. And I've never... I mean... I've..." Jeff found himself all curious now. Ginger Szabo had never kissed a boy? To his surprise, he pressed his ear to the wall to hear better. "I've got an idea! Hang on for a minute..." He scrunched his brow. What was Linda up to now? The door swung open and Jeff jumped out of his skin in shock. "Jeff!" He froze, knowing he must have looked like a criminal caught in the act. But if she had suspected that he was listening in on them all this time, she must have waved it off, because she said nothing about it. "Jeff, come here, I need you." He stared at her in puzzlement. "What for?" She sighed and grabbed his arm. "Just come on!" "Why-" Before he had a chance to protest, she had already dragged him to her room. He and Ginger locked eyes for a second, and he saw his fear reflected back on her face. Somehow they both knew Linda had just had one of her crazy ideas. "Linda... w-what are you doing?" Ginger stammered. Linda flashed a dangerous smile, then shoved Jeff forward. "Here." Ginger gave her a blank look. "Here what?" "You can practice on Jeff!" In unison, Jeff and Ginger said, "Practice what on Jeff??" Linda rolled her eyes. "And you say I'm dense," she muttered. "If you want to snag Charlie and you think the only way to do it is to kiss him, then you'd better get some practice. So, why not practice on Jeff?" "Hey wait a minute!" Jeff whirled around to protest, but Linda blocked his way. "You owe me, shortstop. Who covered for you when you broke mom's vase when you and Hank were supposed to be playing baseball outside, huh?" She grabbed him by the shoulders and spun him around. "All right," he sighed, walking towards Ginger. "Let's get this over with." Ginger was still staring at Linda, her eyes wide as saucers. "But... Linda, I don't know if this is such a good idea..." "Do you want Charlie to like you or don't you?" She bit her lip then looked back at Jeff. "O-okay..." She leaned in towards him, but stopped short of his face. "I better not catch you enjoying this, buster," she said, and Jeff burst out laughing when she did. "Linda, how am I supposed to do this if he's not taking it seriously?" "Jeff--the vase!" Jeff stopped and rolled his eyes. "Okay, I'll behave," he said. Ginger began to lean in towards him again, but stopped again. "What now?" "I... I'm going to get into trouble..." Linda walked towards her. "What?" "I have to tell you something." "Tell me what?" "The reason I haven't kissed Charlie yet is because... because I'm not allowed to kiss boys yet, okay?" Linda and Jeff looked at each other, and dared each other not to laugh. "It's not funny!" Ginger whined. "How am I ever going to get Charlie Hailey to like me with my parents being such wet blankets?" "I'm sorry, Ginny, I didn't mean to laugh..." Jeff started to walk away, guessing he was no longer needed, but he felt a tug on his arm. "Wait... don't go yet, Jeff." He turned around slowly. "Why not?" he said. "You can't kiss boys yet, and I'm a boy, so why do I need to be here still?" She smiled shyly. "Well... it seems like a shame to waste a good guinea pig..." "That's it, I'm leaving-" "I didn't mean to put it that way! I meant..." She swallowed and looked at Linda. "Promise you won't tell anyone what happens here?" Linda held up her hand. "I swear it! Your mother will never find out..." Ginger smiled at her, and without warning, grabbed Jeff and gave him a quick peck on the cheek. It lasted barely a few seconds, but it felt like an eternity to Jeff, who stood there stunned, mouth gaping open as he stared at the two giggling girls. "You... didn't even tell me first!" he said, wondering if he was complaining because of the kiss itself or because he didn't have the chance to prepare himself for it. "I'm sorry," Ginger said. "I figured it's like taking off a bandage!" "Huh?" "You know, if you pull it off right away, it won't hurt as much." He rolled his eyes and headed for the door. "Girls are screwy!" he said, and slammed the door behind him. He ran for his room and plopped down on the bed, burying his head under his pillows to muffle the sound of their laughter next door. And all he could think about was how he was sure he'd have trouble sleeping tonight. Home| Kyle| Tammy| History| Transcripts|Quotes|Milestones|Episodes| Pictures| Fanfic| Links| Email List